Will Vigar

poet. writer. imposter.



Some kids from Barnsley came round

with their geography teacher

to point and gaze in wonderment

and pity the decaying, failed estate.


“A lack of planning,” he explained,

chest puffed and all-knowing.

“A social experiment,” forgetting that

he was being watched. Not by


the Pinhead or the Bearded Lady

but he kids on the walkways

who took offense and threw

potatoes at them – playing to type


for a terrified audience.

“Who were they to judge?

It’s not like they’re

from Harrogate or York!


Barnsley! And they’re

looking down on us!”

The teacher screamed

for his class to run


having learned

an important lesson.


You don’t poke a tiger

and expect it not to bite.







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